Many years ago now, my friend was cleaning a boat. It was a big boat, designed to tow large cargo ships into dock. The boat had been hoisted out of the water on heavy chains, and was over the dock whilst he and a workmate cleaned the underside.
One of the chains snapped, and the boat came crashing down. His workmate ran one way, he ran another. Unfortunately, he ran the wrong way, and the boat fell on him and killed him.
Before this, we had fallen out of friends for a long time. Just previous to his death though, he had been trying to contact me. He'd wanted us to be friends again. It took me some time, but I agreed that he could come round for a talk. Unfortunately, we never had that talk, and subsequent making up.
Because of this, at his funeral, I felt very awkward. I stayed at the back of the church, because of our fall out. I didn't know how his wife, or his family would react. As it happened, his wife kept looking at me. At the time, I thought she was “glaring” because I never had that talk with her husband.
After the funeral, I was about to leave and she walked over. It wasn't what I thought, she wanted me to go with her back to his parents house with her for the gathering. I did, and his family were very courteous and respectful. Afterwards, she asked me if I'd go back to their house to talk, relive memories that kind of thing.
At the house we talked for hours on end, until dawn almost. She asked if I would visit her regularly, to help her get through this very difficult time. I agreed, and visited her once a week. What I found difficult was that the two children they had, were his doubles. When they looked at me, I could see his face.
I saw a book which his wife had bought the children. I can't remember the title, but it was about a Dragonfly.
The book was to help the children get through the loss of their father. I decided to read it myself. I was totally and utterly impressed with it. I will tell the story in short here, because in my mind, not only does it help with bereavement, but it is a useful way to look at what Ghosts may be. Or at least some of them, because I don't believe ghosts have one explanation that fits all.
The Dragonfly – A quick explanation
Now, I don't know if they are called the same thing around the world, they may be called cranefly or something else where you are. They have a long thin body, wings and long legs. I'm sure you're familiar with what I mean, it's a minor detail anyway.
Dragonfly live in water to begin with. I've actually kept some in a jar to watch. they are flagellates, which means they swim with a whipping motion. In the water they look like tiny lines, that curl or bend, and dart about. Eventually they go to the surface, come out of the water and rest on anything floating on the water, usually leaves or similar. After a couple of days or so of transformation, they get their wings and legs, dry out and fly away.
The story of the Dragonfly
Swimming in the water were some young flagellates, and they were talking (remember this is a children's book) about what happens when they die. As far as they were concerned, their life was just as a water creature. When it came to their time, they'd swim up, crawl on something and die. Some thought however, that it wasn't the end, that there was another life somewhere else.
One of them, told his friends that if there was another life somewhere else, he'd be sure to let the others know, so that it would end this question once and for all. The Dragonflies used to talk about this a lot.
One day, the one that had told his friends, knew his time was near. He slowly swam to the surface, climbed onto a leaf and fell asleep. When he woke some days later, he saw that he had wings and legs. His body had changed in so many ways. He flapped his wings and started to lift.
He got so carried away with the lifting, he started to fly. What an experience that was, he could explore this strange new world just by flapping his wings. After a few hours, he rested. He remembered the talk he'd had with his friends, so he decided he would tell them that it wasn't the end, there was a whole new world after the water.
He flew around a while, then he saw where they were in the water. He flew down to the water and could see them swimming about. No matter how hard he tried, he could not get back into the water to tell them. Couldn't get back into their world to give them their answer.
What this does, is it says to children that because someone close has passed away, it isn't the end. There's another world after this, but the ones who go to it can't come back to this one, but they are ok and happy.
The Dragonfly's ghost
So here's the thing, just like the dragonfly, we discuss the possibility of life after expiration of body. We don't know the answer, we just keep talking in the same way they did.
What made me think ghosts was that the dragonfly who tried to get the message back, couldn't. He flew as close to the water as possible, and could see them, but could they see him? Is it possible to see into the afterlife ? Is it possible for the afterlife to enter this life?
Yes, but only partially, very partially because the two “worlds” differ so much. If a flaggelate looked up when his friend was hovering. He may have seen something very unusual, a faint glimmer of his friend. His friend however could see the water world for what it was, a higher perspective as it were.
Ghosts make their presence felt in many ways, but they're limited. So are our brains to varying degrees. There are those who can easily communicate with those in the afterlife. There are lots who claim they can, but can't. I believe that shortly after the body has expired, in the next “world” we see this one for what it is.
That said however, my opinion is that Ghosts as experienced, are not all afterlife visitors. I don't think it's as easy as that. Historical ghosts for example, are more likely to be time “residue” of some kind.
There's the theory that the building itself “records” a scene, and sensitive people act as playback mechanisms. This is called the stone tape theory, and is popular among ideas of ghost's origin. My view is that the theory is too vague in that it doesn't adequately explain how stone, wood or even plastic is able to record anything. That said, I think that time distortion is a probable. For whatever reason, the past blends with the present temporarily. whilst space remains the same.
Quite often this can extend to an entire environment. There have been many cases of people visiting a place, only to find out when they return that it doesn't exist but it used to. These events aren't in the majority by a long way. Perhaps that reflects the clue that these blended worlds aren't easy to create, or as said earlier, they may be a glitch of some sort.
The cause of these glitches or distortions? Unknown, perhaps it's triggered by traumatic event with the regular historical ghosts. Perhaps they're triggered and perceived by a part of the mind we don't use frequently, there are indeed powerful capabilities of the mind, many remain unexplored. Prophecy may be the same principle in reverse, so instead of a glimpse of the past, we get one of the future.
Ultimately it comes down to our perception for the most part, so it could also be that what is seen, isn't necessarily what is actually there. What we see is what we project onto what is there. That to me explains experiences of seeing a ghost that resembles a person. Because surely the next world will be one without body, so why would it's inhabitants (ghosts) be experienced as if they had bodies? Because that's how we project the experience? We project it with filters of what we think it should look like?
I took part in a ghost night not so long ago. You know the format “most haunted”. Séance, channeller, guys with gadgets etc. All interesting stuff, although I'm not sure it's the best way to go about it sometimes. Anyway, I experienced a lot of things there that were clearly anomalous. What I didn't expect to see was ghostly figures floating about, and guess what ? I didn't !
What intrigues me is how ghostly figures manage to get photographed. Surely that can't be possible? If it comes down to what we're projecting, then that wouldn't show up on a camera would it?
Of course it would, if what we experience makes us project, then we create what we project in those fleeting moments. A controversial subject to be sure, but can we create something from the mind alone? Something that can be photographed? Sure, why not if it's thought into this world, then a camera in this world can take a picture yes?
That doesn't mean every ghost pic is the real deal of course. Just as fleeting as the experience, is our ability to manifest that projection into this world. Because for the most of us it is quick. Those practised can sense for longer.
What I'd be interested to see is if ghost sightings would register a difference on two synchronised atomic clocks. If there really is a time slip as it were, those may indicate that. I don't know, I'm no scientist that's for sure. But if they do, then I put the idea here first and I'll be watching for plagiarists !
So how do we get the answers, like the Dragonflies?
Perhaps there are limitations in the same way as in the story. Maybe we can only handle so much in this world. Maybe we understand more when we turn our skull based TV sets onto a different channel for once? Actually no, there's cable now, so we have lots of channels in our heads. What we need is to use something other than the TV set. A new piece of equipment. Or maybe, just use it in a different way?
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Re: The Dragonfly and the Boat (Score: 1) by Momma on Thursday, June 18, 2009 @ 14:01:41 CDT (User Info )
Your words have shown that the true bond of friendship that held you both together for all those years is still unbroken..and your friend will be secure in that knowledge.
'Waterbugs and Dragonflies' is an excellent book for any bereaved child to read..or to be read to..if the child is not old enough..and as it helps the child..it helps the adult..to understand.
Re: The Dragonfly and the Boat (Score: 1) by cholla on Tuesday, July 14, 2009 @ 21:11:57 CDT (User Info )
Thank you for the wonderful story. My Hubby's Grandmother died tonight. She was 104, and lived an excellent life.
My Hubby is grieving, because she was the one who raised him. The shared stories are gone now, and no one else will ever know him better than her.
I felt the same way when my big brother died several years ago.
I can't get him to read this story yet, but maybe in a while he will. It helped me.
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