I want to thoroughly appologize for my conduct and false posts about me being apart of an elite illuminati family, however i have a damn good reason why i did so and that being that i have had some pretty wild experiences in my life which i desperately need to get off of my chest. Most of what i have told friends and family has been met with disbelief and reticule and that is why i tested this site to find out how people thought about certain subjects and how you would react to certain posts. Alot of the posts that i have responded too i have some knowledge on because of certain events that i would like to express to people that will listen....and through my false posts i have found that most of you are very well versed on what i have been through. I needed to feel that you guys were REALLY open but still inquisitive enough to check on what i was saying. I need a forum like this to help me on what i have been through but i needed reassurance that i was talking to a community that could REALLY understand what i have been through, And for that i am sorry that i have misjudged you all.

It all started when i was but young about 4 and solidly remember being in my room and surrounded by what i used to call "teammates" because they were really really friendly. I used to sleep alone and my mother and step father would fight all night oftentimes me waking up and finding my mother bloody in the bathroom or the kitchen because my stepfather would beat her because the meal that she made him was not good enough. Bastard alcoholic. I would run across the way to the next set of apartments to my friend ernies apartment and there his parents would call the police, but there were times when i would run there that i would be gone for hours when i was running there and suddenly arrive on their doorstep and they would tell me " where have you been the cops have been here and took care of it", but i felt as though it was only a couple of minutes.

As i grew to the age of about six i would wake up in the middle of the night and be surrounded by the "Teammates" and would gladly go with them however i never remembered how i came to be in this odd place but i remember the place. It was filled with lights and many times it had "toys" that i could play with on a table type deal however these toys were not controlled by physical means it was mental and could move them about the room i was in.

I also recall many many times being in a craft and talking to these beings that were more human than anything with helpers that looked kindof like the greys that most talk about. We used to conversate on how the universe was created by a Consciousness and was not what humans on earth thought it was by a small particle creating the cosmos but it was a huge particle that created it through a Consciousness of a "master being" and through his efforts caused the cosmos to expand in a "flash of glory". As i have gotten older at now the age of 27 it seems to have come less with the birth of my child however my wife has witnessed me many times sleepwalking and talking and i would go down the stairs and a bright flash of light would be the last she remembered. When i wake in the morning there is alot of information that i recall "hearing" pertaining to world events and why they were talking to me about it accompanied by severe headaches and nausea.

I would like to get more into this later in posts but only if you can forgive me and understand why i would do what i did in this forum. I hope that you can find it in your hearts and soul why i would post such things as far as i have but after what i have been through i needed to know that i was with kindred spirits. However if you guys feel that i have went too far then i will continue on with my journey.

C13

Have you ever had counselling ? I think it's a good starting point for you. I think that you retreated to an imaginary "good" place when this Thug was ruining you and your moms lives.
Also the symton of pretending to be what you're not sounds to me like you still havent learned to face these things head on.The "Teammates" sound like a coping mechanism you devised. Add to this that childhood memories are always not exactly what we remember but instead are a childs perception of what happened.
Think about seeing someone to talk to .....
Best of luck
Bogey


_________________
I once thought i was wrong ......But i was mistaken.

What you feel is probably not something that you will find a solution for in these forums, per say. You can only find a better path to follow by achieving a new spiritual and intellectual level. By the way, the word is "converse". Yes, like the sneakers.

Read a lot of books and become more acquainted with your creative ability instead of your reactive ability. I have grown up through a lot of pain, as well. Unfortunately, the pain isn't gone since I suffer the pains of the entire Universe, and more directly, of our planet. This is the reality which is awakening in everyone. The fact that we are a collective and the pains of the planet affect us directly whether we know it or not. Wake up to this reality, emotionally, spiritually and intellectually.

I'm sure you're intelligent. I'm happy to hear you have a family as that means there is a human spirit awaiting WISDOM and UNCONDITIONAL LOVE from it's surroundings and longing to one day SHARE this with everything it can. That is the true nature in each of us, it is the reason people share their hate, their confusion, their anger, their pain. We want to share what we have learned. Healing, righteousness and honesty can only come for each one of us from within us. Projecting it only makes the Universe a more harmonious place, in contrast to chaotic and incessantly undefined.

The meaning is within, to project without.

Peace, love and light.



Last edited by Nibiru on Tue Aug 12, 2008 9:09 am; edited 1 time in total
_________________
I pulse in order to enchant
Realizing receptivity.
I seal the output of timelessness
With the solar tone of intention.
I am guided by the power of heart.

Thanks for the apology C13 .. presumably if some of it is sent my way....
I reiterate what Bogeyman has said there about issues relating to your home life as a child...
Im sure there is someone that could help you with that.

Honesty is generally the best policy , it gets to the bottom of an issue quicker and as you can see ...
BoT folk can usually see through facades , lies , and spot folks using more than one ID etc....
But it DOES waste precious and valuable useful member time !

Well done for apologising though! you did something there that many others can't.


_________________
do it while you can

You ask for forgiveness, the usual connection I make with forgive, is Forgive and Forget, I can say I forgive, but sadly I wont forget. Just keep on posting in and through time I may chose to forget your past postings!
Onwards!

Chozen, you show that you are willing to play out an extended elaborate lie. Then when you are given short shrift you first cry foul then complain bitterly and then try to manipulate us to cause division amongst us. This all fails and so you disappear only to reappear a bit later with another story. My questions are:
1. How on earth was your first idiotic game going to prove to you that we know what is needed to help you with the story you are currently spinning.
2. Given your proven complete disregard for the truth, why should we now believe you? Ever heard of the little boy that cried "Wolf"? We'll my friend you've called the whole carnivore section of the zoo!
3. Exactly what do you hope we'll be able to do for you IF this latest tale is true? What help do you want from us?

I very strongly suggest to you that you exhibit every single trait of an internet troll. If you wish to take things forward you need to prove that you are not this. You do so by engaging positively and constructively on the forum. And you keep behaving yourself and you don't go about lying and pulling childish stunts.

Oh yes. I am fully expecting a response explain to me that I am a "cruel, heartless bastard and it's people like me that make the world a sick place and you just came for some compassion and..." stuff like that. That's what a troll would do.

So I'm letting you know exactly where you are at. Be a positive part of this community. Stop lying. Engage with honesty and forthrightness. Or you are history. Goddit?


_________________
music: www.myspace.com/zingdad
art: www.zingdad.deviantart.com/

Hi Chozen13,

Thanks for that. You'll find that you feel a whole lot better inside when you share the truth, and you stay true to yourself. Don't be afraid to share your experiences, as it does help to share.

Zdiddy (said affectionately.. Zingdad you rock, very wise man) means well chozen, and we don't want to be played the fool, so I'm sure you understand where people are coming from.

So, we will listen to what you need to share about your teammates..... and hopefully this helps you to feel better. I have seen one, so I am inclined to hear you out.

btw, my beautiful Daddy always told me I come from good stock too, so you struck a happy chord there w/me.

cruiser

Quite a turn of event's.Chozen 13,you have misjudged a fine group of people. In an attempt to see if they were worthy of your correspondence? Ill planned in my opinion.Most that join BoT admit to lurking and getting a feel for the place before registering.I will suggest that you unload in the "Sounding Off"section of the forum's,or perhap's "It Happened to Me".

Have a real good look around before you swim with shark's,or join forum's.Better chance of keeping your head if you are familiar with the environment.(This is true for all situation's)

I feel for your need for a release,but to cut off the only ear that is listening is a backward step.Did you join BoT to offer insight to a question?Was it to find your own answer's?What you have done is niether.

Stroking the old ego,power trip,fantasy,insult's,TEST ?Apology is not enough for myself,lying is something that is ingrained into some,it resurface's and complicates relationship's.Which is apparent in this situation.I'm not going to bite on this latest sob story.You may not be a "Rothschild" but you share a few of their trait's.I suggest that you find your centre and go from there.Either you are a liar or an honest man and that is a choice that's entirely yours.

As soon as you hit the 20 post mark I PM'd you and offered to help,only because I had a feeling that there was more to your membership than the subject that you were falsely posting on.You ignored the PM,and my request again that you PM me.I will not cry wolf.I saw where this would lead.

You said bad thing's to undeserving people,with whom I have a kinship.You have insulted honest research and experience.Just to be seen as an insider and know it all.

Glad to see that it all went as you planned.I suppose this is part of another test,or ploy to have your voice.

Eternally tuned out.Daddio


_________________
From the half
Of the sky
That which lives
Is coming,and makes a noise

Dream Song

_________________
statistics can be used to prove anything
14% of people know that.

never attribute to conspiracy that which can amply be attributed to the actions of a bunch of greedy stupid self serving men in power

Zingdad wrote:

Chozen, you show that you are willing to play out an extended elaborate lie. Then when you are given short shrift you first cry foul then complain bitterly and then try to manipulate us to cause division amongst us. This all fails and so you disappear only to reappear a bit later with another story. My questions are:
1. How on earth was your first idiotic game going to prove to you that we know what is needed to help you with the story you are currently spinning.
2. Given your proven complete disregard for the truth, why should we now believe you? Ever heard of the little boy that cried "Wolf"? We'll my friend you've called the whole carnivore section of the zoo!
3. Exactly what do you hope we'll be able to do for you IF this latest tale is true? What help do you want from us?

I very strongly suggest to you that you exhibit every single trait of an internet troll. If you wish to take things forward you need to prove that you are not this. You do so by engaging positively and constructively on the forum. And you keep behaving yourself and you don't go about lying and pulling childish stunts.

Oh yes. I am fully expecting a response explain to me that I am a "cruel, heartless bastard and it's people like me that make the world a sick place and you just came for some compassion and..." stuff like that. That's what a troll would do.

So I'm letting you know exactly where you are at. Be a positive part of this community. Stop lying. Engage with honesty and forthrightness. Or you are history. Goddit?

First why would i reply back at you like that? I fully understood what i did and would not call you cruel and heartless as this is the type of response that i expected and would have made myself if the table were turned. Also coming from a tough life not only in family but in where i grew up gave me some pretty tough skin to come back at you with insults that resemble me seeing a psychiatrist and lashing out at the world which is not my intention as i have dealt with all of those demons already, So i support the posts of yours or others that have decided that they will not have anything more to do with me, i just ask that you understand where i was coming from even though it clearly was not the best way. Being able to try to understand and put yourselves in other shoes is a talent that not many possess, however alot of you have tried very hard and given me the benefit of the doubt and for that i am honored.

For the people who have supported me for doing this i thank you and i hope to have some great discussions about what i have been through. I do not need Psychological help as one suggested as i have defeated my personal demons as one of my personal sayings is "you do not confront your demons, you defeat them".

And yes that apology was aimed at everyone that had posted in my original thread.

And minifang i hope you are enjoying that popcorn, i personally enjoy mine with hotsauce.



Last edited by chozen13 on Tue Aug 12, 2008 6:46 pm; edited 1 time in total

All I can say is time will tell. As I said in my other post it's a long road back from lieing, no matter what the reason was. I'm always willing to forgive, but after a 'lie' it'll take alot of work.


_________________
"Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens" - Jimi Hendrix

I didn't say anything in the other thread, but I was observing for a good part of it. If you are really coming out now, and being honest ok. We are always interested in having a good discussion. Most of us came here because we had strange experiences and wanted to share with like minds and learn from each other. But people don't like being manipulated or lied to, and they do remember. Its going to take you extra effort and time now to get people to believe that you want to be a part of this forum. I can kind of understand why you acted that way... but theres still no excuses for behavior like that. That "thick skin" of yours should come in handy, try to have some patience and tolerance now, a lot of other people may still be sore about this.

If this is just another attempt at trolling I have a feeling you wont be around much longer.

Be careful and take care.

I'll also give you the benefit of the doubt and would like to take this as a real opportunity to say


_________________

Formally known as Animal_Gurl

Well I must say Chosen....I hope this is the REAL you that is being revealed
If it is, i carry no grudge and hope you will find what you are seeking. Apology accepted...
It looks like you have had some very interesting experiences...and I hope to learn more when you are ready to share.


_________________
When one tugs at a single thing in nature, he finds it attached to the rest of the world.

~John Muir

Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence

I also give you this opportunity to use this facility on our dearly beloved BoT. The BLOG Facility will give you the chance to maybe make connections with folks on the board. I mean to say you have a good imagination, take the offer, nothing to lose!

http://www.book-of-thoth.com/blog.html

I ain't no stranger to lieing and I am not a stranger to pain. Chozen, always, always start with the truth, honey. You chose the right forum and the wrong tack, I fear.

I wish you well. We all here have had our share of stories and when you add bits of the paranormal or more than bits, things become confusing.

It all is confusing when you have not sorted out some basic issues. Be wise and seek counseling before you go any further.

I say this in all sincerity.


_________________
"Then you'll see, that it is not the spoon that bends, it is only yourself."

Okay sure. You still haven't properly explained WHY you acted as you did. What you say is:

Quote:

i have a damn good reason why i did so and that being that i have had some pretty wild experiences in my life which i desperately need to get off of my chest
...
and that is why i tested this site to find out how people thought about certain subjects and how you would react to certain posts.

So you thought you'd lie to us to test what we know about the illuminati to see if we know enough to help you with the completely unrelated issue of your alien visitation story?
You're kidding, right? No sane person would do that. How did you think you were going to then conveniently change your story later if you weren't caught out? And if you wanted to see how we'd handle alien contact stories you could have picked any five random "It happened to me" threads to read. No need for the elaborate hoax.

Chozen, you are STILL lying.

I don't know why you are here or what you aim to accomplish. But I'll tell you something. There are a lot of really awesome folks on this website that have had a lot of very interesting experiences and others that have devoted considerable time and effort to the serious research of these anomalous experiences. They have come here with open hearts and minds to share and delve and hopefully uncover some of the mystery. These are wonderful, good people with a great deal of collective knowledge and are not deserving of being played the fool with. But because they endeavour to get answers in the paranormal field people think they are credulous. So this process is complicated and challenging enough without having people come in to intentionally muddy the water with frivolous prank playing.
And I'll tell you something else: We see A LOT of trolls on this website. A LOT. Every couple of days some bored brat arrives here thinking he's going to mess with our heads. We see them come. We see what they do. We clean up their mess and ban them. Then they're gone.
Because we don't like to see these boards littered with this rubbish it gets cleaned away. The down side of that is other people then don't see how these stupid waste-of-time attacks were dealt with. And so we get more.
Now explain to me how your first thread was NOT this: a stupid waste-of-time troll attack? Because that's how it looks to me. The only difference here is it's been left to stand for now and I am actually taking the time to lay it out for you.

Chozen, why are you really here and what do you want/ need? If you are serious and straight-up then there are a number of folks here that have a great deal more patience than I do. They are apparently willing to entertain your story and help you as they can. But if you mess with these fine people any more then you are going to get very unceremoniously banned from this board. And your writings will go the way of every other troll that's come around thinking he has the smarts - the bin.

So, one more time: Why are you really here and what do you really want/ need? And if it's just to mess with peoples heads then get the backbone and the decency to say so and go away.



Last edited by Zingdad on Wed Aug 13, 2008 11:03 am; edited 1 time in total
_________________
music: www.myspace.com/zingdad
art: www.zingdad.deviantart.com/

Sits by minifang and watches.

I am still not getting into this. Being the unfortunate recipient of many psychic talents and paranormal experiences in my 55 years, I am waiting to see the "ozone" in you. The use of the non-word "conversate" gave me one clue. Keep 'em coming. It may get interesting yet.

I do want to offer one piece of old folk advice. When one comes in bearing words of truth, it is often hard for me to believe many of them. Most of the time when I have doubted their true intentions, I have been correct. Those folks have been there to challenge me to work through the deceit others display, and why they feel the need to be deceitful. But when someone comes in on a ship of obvious lies and deceit, it hard to ever paddle back upstream and begin again.

dolphin


_________________
per ardua ad astra

yea ill sit back and watch



_________________
statistics can be used to prove anything
14% of people know that.

never attribute to conspiracy that which can amply be attributed to the actions of a bunch of greedy stupid self serving men in power

Oh, what a tangled web we weave,
When first we practice to deceive.


Just so you know chozen13, please don't read any attitude of animosity into any post I make. I simply post according to what my observations and interpretations are. I do my best to live life without anger or hard feelings toward anyone, even if they don't reciprocate accordingly. Having said that though, I do believe Zingdad's caution and skepticism is warranted.

Good luck on any efforts you make to interact with others in sincerity.



Last edited by Sojourner on Wed Aug 13, 2008 1:17 pm; edited 1 time in total

Excuse me for a second while I get off my "angry and somewhat self-righteous" perch for a quick laugh:

dolphin wrote:

The use of the non-word "conversate" gave me one clue.

I hadn't seen this usage before so I googled it. Turns out there is actually a whole blog called conversate-is-not-a-word

and the word even has it's own wiktionary page

You learn something new every day.


_________________
music: www.myspace.com/zingdad
art: www.zingdad.deviantart.com/